theparisreview:

• House lights completely down.
• Disembodied voice fills the void. Male’s. Is that Tim Cook speaking?
• In perfect diction and cadence.
• “Welcome to the Apple Worldwide Developers Conference 2012. I’m Tim Cook, CEO of Apple, and I thank all of you for being here today as we present the newest
• items from our product line.”
• House lights come up, and we see an iPhone on a stool in the middle of the stage.
• “Actually, I’m not Tim Cook.”
• The real Tim Cook enters stage left.
• “I’m Tim Cook,” he says.
• “And I am the next version of Siri,” says the disembodied voice formerly thought to be Tim Cook’s.
• Crowd bursts out in wild applause as they realize Siri no longer sounds like a robot.
• “That’s it, really,” says the real Tim Cook.  “A vastly improved Siri.  That’s all we’ve got.”
• Crowd’s collective brow furrows.  They are sad.
• Somewhere, John Malkovich laughs. (via inothernews)

If only Siri’s response to every query was “Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich.”

Yes.